Meteor

As I drove home this evening, the lights of the city illuminated the western highway. My mind racing. I spend so much time in this fucking car, but it takes me nowhere. Things are moving too fast, especially the thoughts in my mind. I can't drive the car fast enough to escape them. You would think a year of structured meditation practice with an instructor would have taken care of this, but it doesn't. And what stopped my endless, circling thoughts? One of the most beautiful meteors I've seen in a long time. Falling from the sky directly in front of me, it burns through shades of emerald and blue, sparks flying. And at that moment, my mind finally shut up. There are things so much bigger and magical than the pointless chatter that fills my mind...I was grateful beyond words for the reminder. 

Tori Amos - Northern Lad

Had to get my Tori fix in for the night. I absolutely love her...

Had a northern lad

Well not exactly had
He moved like the sunset
God who painted that
First he loved my accent
How his knees would bend
I thought we'd be ok
Me and my molasses
But I feel something is wrong
But I feel this cake just isn't done
Don't say that you Don't
And if you could see me now
Said if you could see me now
Girls you've got to know
When it's time to turn the page
When you're only wet
Because of the rain
He don't show much these days
It's gets so fucking cold
I loved his secret places
But I don't go anymore
"you change like sugar cane"
Says my northern lad
I guess you go too far
When pianos try to be guitars
I feel the west in you
but I feel it falling apart too
Don't say that you Don't
And if you could see me now
Said if you could see me now
Girls you've got to know
When it's time to turn the page
When you're only wet
Because of the rain
When you're only wet
Because of the rain

Tori Amos - Your Cloud

 

where the river cross
crosses the lake
where the words
jump off my pen
and into your pages
do you think
just like that
you can divide
this you as yours
me as mine to
before we were us
if the rain has to separate
from itself
does it say "pick out your cloud?"
pick out your cloud
if there is
a horizontal line
that runs from the map
off your body
straight through the land
shooting up
right through my heart
will this horizontal line
when asked
know how to find
where you end
where i begin
"pick out your cloud"
how light can play
and form a ring of rain
that can change bows into arrows
who we were isn't lost
before we were us
indigo is his own
blue always knew this
if the rain
has to separate
from itself
does it say pick out your cloud

Inspiration

Today I was blessed with some amazing images of nature, right outside my door. First rainbow of the season and first hummingbird, too!!

"Happiness flutters in the air whilst we rest among the breaths of nature"  ~Kelly Scheaffer

"To find the universal elements enough; to find the air and the water exhilarating; to be refreshed by a morning walk or an evening saunter; to be thrilled by the stars at night; to be elated over a bird's nest or a wildflower in spring - these are some of the rewards of the simple life."  ~John Burroughs

Gratitude

Things are difficult right now. I hate feeling sad, even though I know it is a part of human existence and just as important as happiness. I ran across a blog post the other day that was timely for me. It discussed an exercise of simply writing down what makes you happy and what you are grateful for. This is something I should do every day, but especially now, to remind me that things are not bad, they are not bad at all...

Things that make me happy and I am grateful for:
- music
- my band and bandmates
- my dog
- my friends
- having a job
- having the opportunity to go to school
- nature/wildlife/Earth
- green tea
- wine :)
- my massage therapist :)
- a roof over my head, even though it sometimes leaks haha!
- food and clean water
- HOT showers and hot springs
- books
- my measly little attempt at an indoor garden
- Sandy, whom without I'm not sure I'd still be on this Earth
- those who look out for me from other dimensions ;)
- my teachers and past students
- my family

There are people on this earth who suffer everyday, who don't have water to drink or food to eat, who don't have a roof over their head. Who don't have access to a warm shower or to the luxuries that many of us take for granted. It is ridiculous that this is the case, but it is reality. I try to find happiness is the most simple things. In no way do I want my conveniences and luxuries to cause harm to others or to the environment, unfortunately at times they do. So, while I'm thankful for the things I do have, there is so much more I wish I could do to make this Earth a better place. I'm reminded of the quote: "Live simply so others may simply live." At least this gives me something to strive for, minimizing my own ecological footprint, which is so much harder than it seems...

Weather Reflection

05/15/2011

 
It's certainly winter in my heart right now...I thought spring was here, but I was wrong, very wrong...I have to move on and realize that one day the sun will shine...spring will be here and in my heart there will hopefully be room for new life to grow...for the sun to shine...but for now it's cold, dark and empty, as is the winter that lingers on...

Dwelling Among the Beauties and Mysteries of the Earth

Bryce Canyon, 2010

Grand Canyon (on the way to the bottom), 2009 (I think)

Indian Peaks Wilderness area, one of the most beautiful places in Colorado. I can't wait for this area to thaw out and blossom, couple more months to go...

Those who dwell among the beauties and mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life.  ~Rachel Carson

Pasque

I saw my first Pasque flower today, which means spring is finally here at 8600ft. I welcome their arrival every year, after the long, dark, cold winter...

World Population

Check out this video on Grist. I'm feeling mean today so all I have to say is people are so fucking stupid...

Nature

Boulder Creek near Gross Reservoir

Little friend we found on our hike

Chief!!

Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.  ~Albert Einstein

32 Horses

  

32 horses carried me away

on a warm and dusty

summer day

That day I saw

that I could understand

things that few

could comprehend

Her soul so wild

wise and free

she picked me up

under her wing

So young as their spirits 

gathered around me

She walked up strongly

a protective decree

from the darkest hour

that nearly captured me

I've witnessed her soul

heal that of a woman

who shared a similar pain

She knows through 

the images she sees

and the wounds she can feel

She'll test your insecurities

Souls intertwined 

within the divine

Her trust not gained easily

she can see deeper 

than your eyes could ever see

She can feel things 

you may never feel

She connects me to my father

and shows how we understand

the importance of running as fast as you can

with freedom

across an ever-expanding land

32 horses carried me away

they brought me back

forever changed